Reading Minds

 

To the twins,

Here is an example of the conversation last night.

Rosie: Daddy, you know what I am thinking?

Me (figuring okay I will take a shot): You are thinking that you want to dip your chicken tender in that ranch dressing and take a big bite?

Rosie (laughing incredulously): No. When I grow up Mommy will be the baby and I will be the Mommy and Elsa from Frozen will drive the car and then we will all poop. (Quoted thought may not be verbatim and could have included a bunch of other non sequiter thoughts, but you get the point)

Me: Huh?

Eileen: Daddy, you know what I am thinking?

Me (thinking I will try again but aim a little more outside the box): You Ilee? You are thinking about finishing that puzzle with Roro.

Eileen (also laughing at me): No! When Rosie is the mommy, the color purple will taste like an M&M and I’ll eat it all up while doing the bird dance?

Me: You mean the chicken dance?

Eileen (laughing at her self): Oh yeah. Silly Ilee.

Rosie: Daddy, you know what I am thinking?

Me: How can anyone know? Daddy is not playing this game anymore!

Evidently you guys have adopted a new phrase. I was caught off guard and tried to play that silly little reindeer game in a more serious manner. But the thoughts going through your minds remind me of the spread pattern from a twenty eight gauge shotgun using birdshot at thirty yards. So from here on out, my answers to that question will be more and more absurd.

When I was younger, I watched a cartoon show called the Animaniacs which had a segment called Pinky and the Brain about two mice. Brain would always ask the question, “Pinky, are you thinking what I am thinking?” and Pinky would respond with some outrageous like, “I think so Brain, but where are we going to find a monkey wearing leiderhosen?” I have entered that moment where life imitates art.

Sincerely with love from your confused and always guessing dad,

Leo