Monday, June 23, 2014

Old Eyes

To my son Tommy,

I wish I would have documented the "aha" moments of me growing old. I would have wrote down stuff like the first time a hangover went over two days and the first time I was just sitting in one place and part of my body started aching for no good reason at all. This is the type of stuff that will come for you too, mark my words.

Last night, I had one of those moments. I had to give you some children's allergy medicine. I looked at the label to get the proper dosing. Holy schnikies that print is small. I had to lift my glasses to be able to read it. Must be tired eyes right? It was a long day filled with stuff like us going on a rescue mission for your mom breaking down in the car. Yeah, just tired eyes.

Today, at work, I had to get the serial number off an ipad. These darn micro printed numbers. Up went the glasses again. Then it dawned on me that my eyes were failing, on queue, like an appliance breaking down two weeks after the warranty ends. Forty is right around the corner and it seems I am right on track for the typical forty year old parts failing.

Start buying me the large print books and call the eye doctor. Oh, and ready my cane because that won't be far behind. Growing old gracefully is just a myth perpetuated by old people who want you to falsely think they are doing better than you so their misery seems less. Stay young as long as you can.

Sincerely with love from your dad,

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