Thursday, February 27, 2014

Small Head

To my son Tommy,

My beard was approaching Duck Dynasty levels. For some this look works but after a certain length it just starts annoying me. Plus I have an unscientific suspicion that beards harbor cold and flu germs. So the other day, when I was home sick from work, after I dropped you off at school, I came home and shaved.

When I came to pick you up from school, you looked at me and said, "You have a little head."

I had no idea what you were referring to so I responded, "That's funny, most say I am a fat head."

"How'd you get that little head?" you asked in all sincerity.

Still not grasping the link, I gave another smart-alec  reply, "That sounds like a question my fraternity brothers would ask in the old days." Like a good kids show, I like to shoot over the comprehension level of kids in most conversations, even when no other adults are there to give me disapproving looks.

You let it go for a while, or at least for the car ride home, but the first chance you had you grabbed me by my cheeks and demanded, "Why you get this small head?"

Finally, your sometimes slow father put two and two together and realized my fat head had lost all the extra fuzz, and, with my cheeks showing, my face looked much smaller. The rest of the conversation was explaining beards and mustaches and when you would have to start shaving. I remember when I was young and thought beard growing and shaving was the epitome of manhood. I would be tickled when my father would put some shaving cream on my chin and "shave" it off. Now, shaving is one of those manly chores that I could do without. The view certainly does change with age. Don't be in such a rush to grow up, you will have plenty of years of shaving, or perhaps of not shaving, soon enough. I just wish I had taken a self portrait before I shaved to show you what you might have in store.

Sincerely with love from your dad,

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