Saturday, July 20, 2013

Enough To Make A Grown Man Cry

To my son Tommy,

As I have mentioned before, I have started working out in the gym again.  Mr. Drew and I had a session this morning.  When we work out, we don't leave anything in reserve.  We don't temper our first exercise just so we have enough for our last exercise.  Each machine, we give it our all.  This means we are lucky to lift about anything on the last exercise.  Today was no different and by the last machine, which today was the arm curls, we were lifting half of what we normally do.  Every session we change the order of the machines so next session we will start with the arm curls just so the don't get discouraged with our numbers there.  But the point is after we are done, we are done and it is all we can do to get ourselves home.

When I got home from the workout, you and Mommy were still asleep, so I had to unlock the doors.  My keys fell.  I stood there, whipped and exhausted, staring at my keys.  I stood there staring for much longer than anyone would.  I had worked out so hard that the prospect of picking up these keys and opening the door became a major problem in my life.  All the world's problems melted away in the heat and the moment and the only questioned that remained was "Can I?".  A tear came to my eye as I squatted down and reached deep for one last rep.  After I unlocked the door I laughed and cried as I had to make that mad dash to disarm the alarm that now felt five hundred yards away.

I guess the lesson here is that it is okay to give it your all when you are trying to better yourself.  Even if it makes life difficult for awhile, even if it makes you almost incapacitated for a bit, that all will pass.  You don't gain in your comfort area and you got to push yourself.  If I had anything in reserve, if I wasn't drained, that would make me cry even more than dropped keys and a sprint to the alarm.  Hopefully, I will recover enough in an hour for when you wake and want to play.

Sincerely with love from your dad,

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